Friday, November 16, 2012

Healthy Jealousy

Jealousy is a valuable and needed emotion and can render very different results based on how we view jealousy.  I used to see jealousy as an "UGLY" emotion and try to avoid it at all turns.  One day a good friend and role model told me something I didn't swallow to easily at first.  We had a situation between us that evoked jealousy in me.  Being such good friends I was honest about how I felt, honest about my feeling jealous of her and asked for her help in overcoming that feeling.  She responded in a way I didn't expect.  She told me that my jealousy was healthy and a needed emotion.  We had a lengthy discussion on this, I was more defensive of her position on jealousy than I was feeling jealous.  I couldn't accept that I should accept the feeling of jealousy after trying to avoid it for so many years.

I had two things going on inside of me that cemented the belief in me that being jealous was bad.  One was my upbringing.  I grew up putting my own feelings and safety aside to protect my little sister, conditioned from a young age to want better for someone else than myself.  This upbringing built a foundation on the belief that I had no right to be jealous of another and doing so made me selfish and ugly.  The second is my lack of love for myself, lack of belief that I also deserve the same success that I wished for others, all part of the foundation built from a very young age.

I have since learned a lot about being a little selfish in a healthy way in life, learned much about myself, loving me and putting me first.  I have learned that putting me first allows me to truly help others with the honest intent to do just that, rather than help them to be needed or loved.  Over the past few years since my discussion with my good friend on jealousy I have gained much understanding to what she was trying to teach me way back then.

"Isn't it kind of silly to think that tearing someone else down builds you up?"
~Sean Covery
Jealousy is a great emotion if used wisely.  Jealousy is not there to tell us that someone is taking something from us, or that someone has something we can't have.  If we take that negative position on jealousy we breed hate and become haters.  If we flip our view on the feeling of jealousy and realize that when that emotions arises it is telling us that we are missing something in us, not having something taken from us.  Use the emotion as fuel to build on what we are missing, see it as a positive indication that we need to look within and work on realizing that we also deserve the same happiness we see others with and change our beliefs that are creating jealousy in us rather than celebration for others happiness.  The first indication of using jealousy in the right way is having a feeling of happiness and joy for others happiness.

I am new in the Network marketing world, I am feeling pretty blessed at this point that I joined up with the team I am a part of.  Today is the second day I have seen other network marketing people verbally attack someone on our team on a post on Facebook.  Also the second time I have been majorly impressed with the lack of negative retort from my team members.  The company I am working with does not hate on other companies, we honestly don't have to.  ViSalus is growing at record breaking numbers, the product works; is saving and changing lives by helping us get healthier and earn a living in an economy that is not so easy to advance in these days.  Most importantly we really are a team. We lift each other up daily.  I have never had so much love and support before.

Promote what you LOVE instead of bashing what you HATE :)
A lot can be said for positive people and the effect they have on you when you are surrounded by them. I love that in my personal life I am surrounded daily by such positive and uplifting people and in my online world I am also.  Almost every post I read in my news feed every day is uplifting and positive.  I am a member of a lot of spiritual groups and subscribed to great pages that promote oneness among us all.  So I get emails all day from positive sources and I get to view post after post of great stuff in the social networks I am in that makes my day better, keeps me positive all day.

Doin It Movin
Rise above the noise in life, let your actions speak for themselves and
keep moving toward your goals and dreams, with your eyes toward
the light that shines from within.  Let the naysayers nay-say, let the
haters hate.  Offer them nothing less than compassion and love
we have all been there once or twice in our lifetime.  Remember life
is  journey, our journey of experiences and lessons, don't take it
to seriously, live it, love it!
Every once in a while I see a negative post about someone complaining about life and I remember when I used to feel that way so I just send some love their way.  When we get to a place in life where we are really loving life, loving ourselves we don't lack understanding for those who aren't there.  If another persons negative attitude threatens our happiness we shouldn't be mad at them we should take a look at ourselves.  They are just expressing their unhappiness, if we are truly happy nothing can threaten that, we can share some of our joy to help those who aren't there yet.  If someone's happiness threatens us than we really need to talk a look at ourselves.

If you run across a lot of crabs trying to pull you back into the pot in life that just means you are free from that boiling pot and getting closer to your dreams and goals, don't worry about it.  Offer them a hand out of the pot in love and keep pushing.  We all have our paths to walk, our lessons to learn and life isn't about proving anyone wrong it is about getting really good at being wrong ourselves and learning how to be right without judgement of others.  When we are living right we just can't judge others, we have no need to.

I love you all from a place of gratitude for the sea of positive energy I am blessed to swim in today.  I wish everyone out there the most blessed, positive, uplifting life experiences.  Have a great weekend.

One Love

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