Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Changes Happen

And they can happen so quickly, one day things are one way the next the wind changes direction and clears a whole new path.  I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and in it's needed time.

Day one of 2013 was a lot of things, mostly great moments of realization and pride in myself and my team, precious moments with my grand-babies and overall a huge success in future goal setting.  I spent New Years Eve day packing up and hit the road mid day toward Sacramento to join my team.  Super excited that the team flyer I created to help me and my Sac team grow and the smart posting of one of my team mates on craigslist had gotten her a call from a local new channel in Sacramento who wanted to interview us on day one of our workout for the beginning of our team challenge.

Blessed and Honored to be on a Team with Family and Friends.
You all rock the most from coast to coast and I know we are gonna crush 2013

All day was spent on the road and on the phone planning the interview with all of my team, we all talked back and forth, made plans for promoting our challenge on the news the day to follow.  Two of our teammates went out and got us all green shirts to rep ViSalus and our challenge.  Me and my teammate making the arrangements with the news channel discussed promoting our challenge, making sure both of our blogs got on the air so people would be able to see our stories and have contact info to join us and we both collaborated with the rest of our team throughout the day making plans for the exciting opportunity to promote our challenge, team business and the teammate who got the calls future fitness business for when she graduates and is licensed to train others.

I stopped in Union City on the drive up and had lunch with my dear friend and fellow challenger Diane.  We laughed as we talked about all that has happened since I left Sacramento a year ago, how different things are in my life today.  The power of me loving me and I thanked her once again for being one of the biggest sources of support throughout it all.  She looks great by the way, she has been on the Challenge for a couple months now and glowed with pride when she told me how some of her family members have been exclaiming how amazing she looks with the weight loss and glowing skin.

I got into Sacramento after dark and the park I thought was secured informed me they were full, so I pulled up in front of my Son Semaj's house and spent the night with him, my beautiful daughter Lovlisha and my grand babies.  Omareous and Renee' both slept in the trailer with me after much begging and pleading to do so.  We all cuddled up and pretended we were on a camping trip and told stories, giggled and dozed off to sleep with them in my arms looking like little angles.  It felt great to be home.

I woke super early, 3 am to be exact.  Excitement for my team and the news coverage wouldn't allow me to sleep.  I layed in bed and watched my little Angels sleeping, said some prayers and around 4 am went inside and accidentally work up the household grinding coffee beans, haha.  Surprisingly no one was mad at me and the rest of the morning was spent sharing coffee and laughs as me and my daughter got ready to head to the park for the news interview.  My daughter Shawntice showed up right on time and off we headed to our teammates house to pick up our green shirts and head to the park.

As we pulled up to the park the News van was there already.  Our teammate began explaining to us how she had set everything up, she told us all that we would all be interviewed.  She explained that she gave them all of our names and told them why we were here.  She also went on to tell us that her number would be posted on the interview and explain how anyone who called her would be included in the group as a whole.  I was impressed with her level of confidence and had full confidence in her to take the lead in representing our team.  I remembered her first challenge party when I offered to do the announcements to lead in for her incase she was nervous or shy and she told me that shy is one thing she is not, explained that she loves to talk in front of crowds and has never been scared to do so.  I was excited for her and us all for having this awesome opportunity to start the year off with this blessing.  When the news reporter asked her who would be interviewed and she said her and didn't mention the team or group I smiled and thought to myself, let her handle this, she can do this and will represent us all.  I wasn't concerned that she said only her would be interviewed after just moments earlier telling us we all would be and things were underway so I just let it go.

We started with some stretches then a mile walk around the park.  I could only do a half of a mile as my knees are not up to par for the impact of walking long distances yet.  We did a work out while the camera began to roll.  Again I had to go light on that as we were on concrete and the impact on my knees was taking it's toll already.  As the interview progressed with us all working out me and my teammates were hit blindsided by the direction the interview took as our "friend" and "teammate" took the lead and completely left everything about why we were there out of the interview.  In fact when she was asked by the reporter "how she got all of us women to come together like this" she took full credit and said she organized a womens walking group as her dreams have always been to help women.

In the back row me and Natasha were throwing up Vi-Signs and yelling Vi-Life in hopes she would get on track with why we were there, that never happened and the news report ended with her talking only about her, her fitness business and how she has lost weight outside of the challenge.  We all maintained our composure as we packed up and walked away while the news casters were still there and we just wanted to get moving on while we figured out what just happened.  As we walked away one of my teammates looked at me and asked "what exactly were we promoting there besides her?"  I shook my head and said "absolutely nothing apparently".

While getting in our cars our teammate who just sucker punched us all with this interview said goodbye and told us how proud she was of us all.  I got in the car with my daughters and one of them asked me why she would take credit for bringing us all together for a workout group when I brought us all together for a team challenge?  I said I had no idea, I was just as floored about it all as they were.  One of them asked why we even wore green shirts and our Vi-Bracelets if it wasn't gonna be about the team.  I felt like crap for the team, and was confused and kinda in shock to be honest.

The phone calls started coming in from friends and family who saw the news and were confused as to why we didn't promote the challenge.  There was much disappointment from many in the community who were so excited for this opportunity for our team and I really had no answers.  My little Sister sent the teammate interviewed an honest and nicely written inbox expressing her disappointment for her claiming she brought us all together and the missed opportunity for her to represent her team and the challenge.  Many were upset that she never mentioned the word team, challenge, ViSalus or anything besides herself.

She called me, pretty much going off and listing a dozen reasons why she didn't say anything we had talked about.  Placed blame on me for not giving her more guidance and over exaggerated my sisters inbox to her.  I was in the middle of setting up my trailer at the new park with the managers here and told her calmly that what's done is done, it was unfortunate we missed a chance to promote our team, the challenge and our business and we would talk later when I was not with people.

I called her back, no answer.  I wrote her a calm inbox explaining my disappointment in the way things turned out, sharing with her the feelings of others as expressed to me over the course of the day and telling her to stop posting public apologies on her personal facebook page implying there was some behind the scenes drama going on when there wasn't.  I suggested that if she wanted to apologize to her team or anyone she do it maturely and directly to those she wanted to apologize to rather than make a public spectacle of the situation as what happened was behind us and airing it in a negative light wasn't going to benefit any of us.  That didn't stop her from commenting further on her post and implying more that "everyone" didn't understand why she did what she did and making excuses and taking no responsibility for what really happened.

She called me back screaming and yelling at me saying she was going to stick up to me, I told her to calm down if she wanted to talk to me, I was not attacking her to not attack me.  She went on to make excuse after excuse and place all the blame on me, yelling that I am her upline and should have taken over.  I asked her one question... "Even if all that were true, when the reporter asked you how you got all of us together what did you tell her?"  She said "I told her I started a womens walking group" after studdering around the question and pointing out how that section wasn't aired.  I replied "and that was a lie and weather it was aired or not your team heard you tell that lie" and hung up on her.

I text'd her and said if you want to stick up to me yelling like that you will have to do it alone because I am not doing this with you again.  I say again because I have been here before.  This friend happens to be the very same friend who I fell out with earlier in 2012 over this situation on this entry...

We have since mended bridges and I thought it was a good lesson for us both.  I never stopped loving her and still do.  I get that we all are learning and I am far from the point of not making mistakes in life or being wrong.  After all that is the point of life isn't it.

I got in my truck and headed out to buy a new sewage line for my trailer as I accidentally left mine behind in the rush to get up here for all this excitement.  As I pulled into the parking lot my phone rang and it was my up-up-up-line, haha.  Someone I love and respect much who has been a huge mentor to me asking what was going on.  She had put in a few calls between the time I hung up on her and reaching the store to a couple people in my upline and I found myself on the phone apologizing for the drama even being brought to their door.  I was so embarrassed that this situation was being blown out of proportion and quite put aside that I was being blamed and lied on by someone who I have been doing nothing but trying to help.  I suggested that he call everyone on my Sacramento team after we got off the phone and talk with them directly and ask them what happened and how much planning and guidance went into this.

While I was on the phone apologizing and laughing about this all a text came in from her that read...

"I handled it.  I spoke with "_____"
He made me feel better.  Thank God
for real leadership. I have a call placed
with ViSalus about how I can be removed
from your team.  I have printed all of your
emails to me as proof of abuse on your part.
I will not be belittled and treated like crap
"cause it wasn't all about YOU".
I will be successful on my own!  I have my 
own story and it speaks loud and clear.
Probably why "I" got the call.

I took a deep breath and called my up-line.  Read the text and asked what the best course of action was.  I already knew that she cannot be removed from my down-line.  It just doesn't work that way.  I expressed that at this point I would prefer to not be directly involved with her anymore either.  I just don't need the drama.  And I certainly do not want to work with someone who would go this far.  It would never occur to me to call ViSalus and complain about anything my up-line does, or try to hurt someone else's reputation or business, especially with lies like the ones told about me when she made these calls.  I asked if others in my up-line could reach out to her and offer their support so she can continue to better herself and build her future and it was done.

I am the coach of my team, my emotions
don't run me this year, I run them with love!
I took my up-lines advice to have no further contact, to not reply to any of the texts or any further contact.  Sat there in my car and grabbed a hold of the whistle around my neck and remembered the very words I said to my daughters in the car earlier that morning when I explained why I was wearing the whistle to remind me I am the coach of my team, my team is my emotions and life is the game.  I explained to them how I decide which emotions to play and which ones to bench in life.  I said some prayers holding onto that whistle and asked for the sick feeling in my stomach to go away.  Prayed for both her and I to sever emotional ties with love so that we can both move on.

I left the parking lot and went to my daughters house to get some family love to help me feel better.  I played with my grandkids and got my team together in person and on the phone so we could move on to planning our team challenge to start today.  I needed to be productive and needed to be around some positive energy.  I was feeling sick to my stomach over how quickly things had changed from me driving up here so excited and feeling on top of the world to all this drama, blame, lies and hurt feelings of more than just me.  My team expressed to me how they felt used.  They were upset that she took credit for bringing us together and made the whole thing about her.  They were disappointed that they had told so many about the interview and wanted to promote their challenge and business and were bummed that they never got to say a word on the news about their why's and what we were really there for.

There is no "I" in T-E-A-M
One for All and All for One is our commitment to each other for this team challenge.
What happened, happened.  We are turning disappointment into fuel to be a better, stronger team and focus on what matters most, being part of a great team, loving and supporting each other always and making all our dreams come true for us and our futures, for our families and our selves, we got this.

We all agreed to accept it as it was.  We all decided the best way to get past it was to focus on our team challenge and our futures and spent the rest of the day making plans, encouraging each other and making a  commitment to be a team, one for all and all for one at all stages of this next 90 days.  We reassured each other that no one of us is bigger or more important than the other and committed to always putting the team ahead of our own feelings so that we can be a success in this challenge and grow stronger from it as we build our futures and gain our health and sexy back.

This was one big learning experience for us all, for me it reminded me that life throws us curve balls and I can either pass or strike out.  I controlled my emotions for the most part yesterday.  I shed a few tears and that is okay, tears are the souls way of cleansing.  I came home last night and prayed for my friend to find her way and be successful in all areas of life and for forgiveness to be ours.

Last night I was blessed to cuddle up with my youngest grand daughter who wouldn't get under the covers as she was hot with a fever and just needed some Nani love.  We took a nap together before I headed back to my new park to settle in for the night after a long day of getting our team challenge on, this new path is going to be filled with lots of things like all paths I have walked and today I am ready and excited to face it all, I am blessed to be home near my family and have the honor of working with some people I love dearly.

This morning I woke up letting go of any concern for the things said about me that just weren't true.  I reminded myself that I know my truth and she knows hers and in between that somewhere is the truth that we are just learning as we go.  It is okay that this all happened and today I am starting fresh leaving this all here in the entries of my daily journal, my journey to learning and loving myself.  I thought about not writing this entry, but decided this is what's going on in my life, and the whole point of my blog.  I chose not to mention any names and even though many know what and who happened, they know because they have already seen some posts by others placing blame.  This is my life, my blog and my truth. Not intended to hurt or harm others, only intended to share my story.

I have found my Gym up here, my girls are all joining it too and we are going to crush the carp outa this Team Challenge.  I am doing two Challenges now, haha.  My personal one that will end on the day Nationals in LA opens and this new Team Challenge that will wend on April 1st just 8 days before my Birthday.  What a way to celebrate my 44th.

2013 is the first year of my life I am entering it loving myself fully.  While this journey continues as that is what life is, it is a journey and the destination is not what matters most.  I am able to look back and know in 2012 I made some huge promises to myself and kept them.  This year is my year to find out what success in all areas of life means.  Success earned by taking all the steps needed to get there, no short cuts, no bad choices just to get to my desired destination.  I am taking all the steps needed and doing so honestly and with integrity.

Sharing this all with you has helped me in so many ways, I believed in the beginning of this journey that we should all be more honest about how we are doing, what is going on in our lives, with our fears, struggles and triumphs and I still believe so more now than every.  Saying it out loud helps me to grow in so many ways, mainly because those thoughts, fears and doubts have little power over me when put to type here.  I can see them for what they are and grown from my mistakes, wrongs, doubts and learn the lessons I need to learn in this life.

I love you all from a place of knowing everything happens for a reason and it is okay.  We all got this, being wrong or wronged is not what matters most, how we accept and own it is what matters most.  Have a most blessed New Year my friends.

Vi-Life Baybee
It's How We Roll!!!

I have the huge honor of speaking at The Worlds Largest Resolution Rally in Roseville this coming Saturday January 5th and would love any of you to come along and learn about ViSalus, the company that has helped change my health and prosperity in so many ways.  I would be honored to have all of you in the audience when I share my story.  Call me if you want to join us, there is no charge, come on down and declare your promises to yourself for this New Year.  408-508-ICAN "4226"

One Love

Pin It

No comments:

Post a Comment